When we are little kids, we are creative, spontaneous, playful, active and tireless- even entrepreneurial. I realize with age the second to later of the qualities will diminish naturally, but what about all the other things? If I wanted to play- I would go outside and build a fort in the forest. If I wanted to be creative I would draw pictures for everyone- including hand-drawn cards for holidays (I am pretty sure my mother still has them somewhere and no, they were not good). If I wanted to be better at something- I would put my sneakers on and challenge the kids in the neighborhood to a race (or my poor father- who I only successfully beat when I was a senior in high school). Want to move up in band? Sure- I would pick up my trombone and learn a whole book of songs, in a day. That was not for bragging rights; I genuinely wanted to be the best “first chair” in the band (no need for the comments- and yes, I did go to band camp). My friend Heather and I would ride our bikes from sun up until sun down. Courtney and I would pack a backpack (apple juice, cereal and granola bars) and venture into the forest for a day of exploring. If I wanted to make money- I would create a plan to sell lemonade or bracelets, and execute it, making everything by hand. It was non-stop and I had a blast doing it all.
So where does this ambition go? Have we become so comfortable with the lives played out for us that we stop living life and just allow life to happen to us? We have our routines and a whole new set of responsibilities that one can’t put aside for a horror-movie-a-thon until you have seen every single movie on the wall in Handy Ron’s Video Store (yes, I did this one summer), but at what point should we take some time to find that inner CEO we all were as children? In high school, I would race from (insert sport of the season/moment here) practice to my voice lesson, then home. The next day I would have Odyssey of the Mind, track practice and then play rehearsal. My routine now consists of work, work events, MAYBE working out when I have the energy, walking my dog, watching television and cooking. I make an effort to work in some charity work from time to time- but even my traveling isn’t for my own reasons anymore. I only ever travel for someone else’s needs.
I don’t mean to complain, again…as I always seem to with this forum, but honestly I am rather irritated with the pattern I have fallen into. I get more excited to get into bed and watch a movie I have seen 100 times than I would about experiencing something I have not done before. I still freelance some of my work, but even that is WORK! Ugh- it’s exasperating.
I am vowing to strike this lazy behavior from the record and LIVE again! Maybe take guitar lessons (something I have always wanted to do, but a bad experience with a rude teacher left me jaded for a while) or do a cooking class…maybe even get my Masters. I will have to think on this one because even the idea of doing something that doesn’t involve my couch right now is giving me a headache.