Category: reality

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Pause.

Since I have been a blank slate lately…I decided to reflect today, and post some random thoughts. This will not make sense at all- but it’s better than nothing, and just maybe you will be thinking the same things!

1. I’m excited about the Royal wedding. I get so wrapped up in romantic comedies, that I forget romance and tradition still exist. I adore everything I have heard about both parties involved. I will be waking up at 3am to cry and cheer with London.

2. I am getting very tired of the cold weather in Chicago. What is even worse- is that we have been given like 3 days of nice weather to tease us. I even went outside this weekend for a long walk with my dog and boyfriend. Right as my spirits are lifted- its rainy and 40 degrees again. I’m starting to think it has something to do with God being upset at the political figures that keep coming out of this state.

3. I cannot stand people who are rude, mean, judgmental and braggy. Unfortunately I have too many people who fit all of these adjectives to comment on. Can they please just shut up and be normal?

4. Work has been amazing lately. I am very happy in my job- and actually get excited to get up in the morning. Have not felt this way since 2004. It’s nice to be back in this phase of my life. Smiling feels good. Meaning it feels so much better.

5. Gas is getting annoyingly high in price. I might start rollerblading to work, if the damn sun would come out.

6. Do people ever really take the time to consider other people’s feelings? I often wonder how I could make this a hot trend.

7. I hate when my friends are sad and/or hurting. I wish I didn’t live so far away all the time. I have a couple friends who have heartaches right now. Why is traveling so damn expensive?

8. I want to plan a trip with the boyfriend to someplace warm. I know he is dying to get in the sun- hmmm. Suggestions? I was thinking Puerto Rico.

9. Have you ever googled Jon Scheyer? There is a basketball player from Illinois who makes the most stupid face as he goes for a shot. Google it- you’ll laugh. Also- next time you are frustrated and cannot put it into words- just send a picture of the Scheyerface- and the recipient will understand.

John Scheyer
my thoughts exactly.

10. I’m sad Mad Men producers can’t get their act together and put the show back on TV. I loved that show. In a recent attempt to put a band-aid on our wounds from the loss of Mad Men, we started watching Dexter. If you have not seen this show- start from season 1. The writing is amazing. Although- I am “all set” with his sister on the show (ex wife in real life), Debra Morgan. She has a horrible potty-mouth and has the most vulgar way of being. She also needs to eat a steak. You’ll know what I mean if you’ve seen it- and if you take my advice and watch it.

I hope everyone had a nice Easter. 🙂

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Working out and getting older…

Disclosure: I understand that what I am about to rant about makes absolutely no sense at all. It’s just me.

I like to believe that my body chemistry is unlike anyone else in the entire planet. By believing this, I can avoid listening to stereotypical advice on what to eat and not to eat, how much you should work out, and how much sleep a person needs.

Food/Eating

I have the pickiest eating habits of anyone else I know. Sometimes food that made me sick a week ago will be fine today, if I am in the mood for it, but then sick again in a day because I said so- and it really will. Shrimp was my favorite food growing up, and since age 25 I have been allergic to it (hey, ask the doctors at Mass General, if you don’t believe me). I am lactose intolerant, but LOVE cheese (especially paired with wine). I get a stomach ache from almost every meal (from even a salad)- yet my cravings ONLY consist of chocolate, puffy Cheetos and chicken wings…that of course my body digests perfectly. I feel sorry for my boyfriend, who will have to preview a menu to make sure there is something on it I will digest. He even researches the places I go for client lunches and will text message me the menu item that won’t kill me. It’s actually very sweet. Funny thing is, on our first date, I assured him that I was easy going and not picky about food. I guess it had never been pointed out to me before, as I only ate what I wanted- and didn’t realize that consisted of a very limited range. Hey- I’ll eat sushi!

Working out

Working out to me has been this enigma that I have been trying to solve since college. I can’t quite figure it out. Did people in the 1960s (or earlier) work out? I watch the show Mad Men- and there is an episode where the newly divorced woman in the neighborhood is seen “walking.” GASP! “Where is she walking to???” The other women cry. Her response- “I just like to walk.” The only other exercise I have seen on that show was of course the young school teacher, aka, Don Draper’s latest victim, running at 4am. So only young school teacher-types and divorced women work out, while the “normal” women smoke and drink red wine 24/7? YET…They are ALL thin and gorgeous. (Please note- I realize I am arguing with a television show, but if you look at pictures from that time- the women really were perfect looking!) I won’t argue much past the 1960s. I think we all know that the 1970s brought the leotard to us, for the purpose of exercise class. I’m just saying- there WAS a time when we didn’t need to think about all this so darn much. Red wine solved it all.

In college, I worked out so much that if my friends and I were getting ready to go out, and I felt kinda “fat,” I would go run a mile or two then continue the beautifying process. I tried diet pills- that only made me seem to be on speed 24/7. Lost a couple dates that way (I guess you’re supposed to let the other person talk too), yet never really got thin, until I STOPPED taking them. Strange.

Now that I am in my 30s, working out is like this chore I know I have to do, yet stall until it hits me like a deadline that it must be done. Other days, I crave to be on that treadmill. Neither situation would be possible without the use of my boyfriend’s extra Apple headphones (I plug them into those beautiful little TVs installed on top of the machines). At first, I could “borrow” them, but now they have slowly become my property and just as important for me to wear to the gym as my sneakers or sports bra. I also have the belief that if I work out 1 week prior to a special event or trip, that my body will be drastically better than it was the day I started. If a special event or trip is coming up, all of a sudden I LOVE working out and couldn’t image never loving this activity. When said event is over…give me my couch/remote back.

Sleep

I will never understand how one sleeps through an entire evening, without waking up. I have tried everything from counting sheep, melatonin to benedryl- nothing works. I will say, at the suggestion of a colleague, I bought some vitamin B1 and (when I remember) it works like a charm to ease my mind and let me sleep, at least until 3am. I can fall asleep in a car in about 2 minutes, or when laying on something warm. Once awake, I can never figure out how to stay up without being exhausted. Caffeine makes me tired and coffee gives me a headache. If someone puts a movie on, 10 minutes (sometimes less) into it, I am sound asleep. When it ends- like the second it is over-I am wide awake. I will say this- there is nothing more victorious than when, from the hours of tossing and turning, you find that perfect sweet-spot and your eyes finally close.

I think I need a vacation. 🙂

 

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Starting on the right foot…hello world.

This quote pretty much describes my view on life:

When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get one, but you won’t come up with a handful of mud either. -Leo Burnett.

Leo Burnett started off with criticism, both from the NY market and the Chicago media. A journalist stated he would fail miserably, and end up selling apples on the street. His ambition fought back, and soon he was laughing at the world- giving away those apples for free.

I have never understood the perma-waitress or clerk, who stays in the small town and accepts the hand dealt to her, without complaint. I supposed it would make up for a less stressful life, but what fun is life without challenges? I’m not knocking the service industry. In fact, I admire one who takes pride in their work. I’m more or less questioning the lack of wanting something more. Shouldn’t we all want more? If you want to make yourself a better person, I certainly don’t think that would classify as greed. Ambition, to me, is the sexiest attribute in a person.

As I sat in my car the other day, singing at the top of my lungs to my Taylor Swift CD, I couldn’t help but start to analyze the life choices I have made up until now. I guess it’s normal to judge yourself- mildly. I can’t help but be a little confused as to whether I am truly happy, or if I am faking it in order to deal with some things I seem to have missed out on. I have always felt a little different, but never like this… I am speaking of course about the fact that MOST of my friends are now married, engaged, pregnant, or new mothers. Shouldn’t I want that at 33? Could ambition come in different forms? I think the engaged/married part would be really fun- but I couldn’t even conceive the notion that I am ready to be fully responsible for someone (meaning a baby) other than my golden retriever. Does that make me a selfish person?

Does a career count as something to cherish? I have always certainly thought so.

Frustrated and happy. Is that possible?